highm0bility

CHANGE HAS COME

2009-07-03T23:20:00.001+08:00

It has been decided by the higher powers that change shall be implemented.

The fast life is over, and this blog shall now be left to rot in cyberspace.

http://themirrorworld.wordpress.com

Time for Change?

2009-07-01T21:52:00.001+08:00

I'm contemplating over whether I should create another blog.

Reason is because I want to resort out my stuff and reorganise them in a more orderly manner. Wordpress?

Imagine Life Without Colour

2009-06-28T08:34:00.001+08:00

Week 25: Imagine Life Without Colour
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Exam week is drawing near. These have been adding colour to my life of mere words and lines.

Of course, I must not forget friends who studied with me! =)

This Love Never Ends

2009-06-25T23:18:00.002+08:00

This Love Never Ends
- Takeda Kouhei

キミの愛を得るためなら
戦士にもなれるさ　If you need me

「太陽に憧れて　高く高く飛んだ翼
その熱に溶かされて　深い海へと墜ちて行く」

そんな物語さえ　オレの心には響かない
信じるのは　運命の愛だけ

舞い上がれ　青空焦がし
真っ赤に染めるほど
この愛の価値を見せつけよう
For you　見つめ合えば
This love never ends　誰も誰かの
自由は奪えない
限界を決めるのもオレなら
For you　無限と言い切ろう

「天にも届く位　積み上げられた塔もまた
神の怒りに触れて　脆くも地に崩れ落ちた」

教えなんていらない　普通の常識じゃ通じない
キミと創る　伝説を残そう

舞い上がれ　青空越えて
まだ見ぬ宇宙（そら）の果て
輝きだけを見せてあげよう
For you　指に星を
This love never ends　聞く耳持たず
すべてを突破する
不可能なんてオレにないこと
For you　キミだけのために強くなるのさ

止めどなく溢れ出す
比類無きこの自信で
キミがいる素晴らしい
世界　守ることを誓う

舞い上がれ　青空焦がし
真っ赤に染めるほど
この愛の価値を見せつけよう
For you　見つめ合えば無敵

So this love will never end, never end
心に決めたから
この愛守るためのポテンシャル
For you　無限だと言い切ろう
I swear…proud of my love, proud of my life

========================================

If it's to win your love,
Then I'll be a soldier, if you need me

"Attracted by the sun, flying up, high up on wings
The heat melts them, and he falls into the deep sea"

Such stories don't ring with my heart
Cause I only believe in fated love

Rise up! The blue sky
Is scorched till it's deep red
I'll show you the value of this love
For you, if our gazes can connect...
This love never ends, nobody
No one's freedom can be stolen
If I decide on my limit
For you, I say there's no limit

"A tower was also built so that it could reach the heavens
God unleashed his anger and it crumbled to the ground"

I don't need your teachings; "Common sense" doesn't work on me
Let's leave behind legends that I'll create with you

Rise up! Pass the blue skies
To the yet unseen ends
I will show you nothing that doesn't shine
For you, a star on your finger
This love never ends, I will hear nothing
I will break through everything
There is nothing impossible for me
For you and you alone I will become strong

I am always overflowing
With this unparalleled confidence
I swear to protect
The wonderful world you live in

Rise up! The blue sky
Is scorched till it's deep red
I'll show you the value of this love
For you, I become invincible if our gazes connect

So this love will never end, never end
For I have sworn it on my heart
My potential for protecing this love
For you... is infinite
I swear…proud of my love, proud of my life

Presents

2009-06-20T10:41:00.001+08:00

Week 24: Presents
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Another 'happy' photo.

Happy Day, Many Thanks

2009-06-15T22:58:00.004+08:00

Really tired, but I had fun. Kudos to Sonia and Xiuqing. Haven't had this much fun in a while. And yes I feel happy, even though my face doesn't really show it. REALLY! I'm just tired. Night at the Museum 2 was funny, and so was Rush Hour 2 and 3 XD

I really appreciate the gifts as well. I shall find some way to place Spidey-s on my cupboard. I have to find a place for the camera/coin box as well. And the card and the Mr Happy book. Oh yes, and Sarah as well. Your notebook, very unique. I have to find stuff that's worthy of recording in the notebook. =)

Again, thanks to the Infocomm Exco for the cake, and to friends who wished me via sms/facebook/personally etc etc...

Come to think of it, I am real lucky to have my birthday celebrated... TWICE! Yes Xiu, I'm real lucky...

As you can see from this extremely short post, my brain is really fried... That's how tired I am... But thanks again Sonia and Xiu!

Bliss

2009-06-13T21:44:00.001+08:00

Week 23: Bliss
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Originally, I wanted to have a more 'sad' or emo-ish picture for this week, something to mark the end of my journey in Infocomm. I even had a title and a concept all planned out, but alas things were not meant to be (don't ask me why, I'll blow my top).

Loads of happy stuff occurred this week, and Infocomm Camp rocked. It's sad to step down, but at least my last day at camp came as quite a surprise.

At 12 midnight on 12th June (that's my birthday for those who don't know), the Photog/AV exco wished me Happy Birthday, alongside with the Mr Lau-s, and some smses from church members. I saw that coming, but at 1.30am when I went to AV Room for post-hustings discussion, there was a cake! Really didn't see that coming.

To the outgoing Photog exco, I guess we all had fun in our term. It was both fun and tiring to work with you guys (or should I say girls ><). We had our happy times, and loads of emo times for me. To the outgoing AV exco, it was fun knowing and working with you guys even for the short 6 months. Lastly to the incoming Infocomm exco, all the best in your term. The most important thing, HAVE FUN.

Hiding in the Mirror

2009-06-07T23:26:00.003+08:00

As some of you might now know, I have 'officially' started on my "Mirror World" project*. The reason why I use the inverted commas is because I have yet to start shooting (pictures), but am doing research into the topic. In the course of my research, I stumbled upon a rather interesting and fascinating book called "Hiding in the Mirror", by Lawrence M. Kauss. It was a pleasurable read, and it took me nearly three weeks to complete it.

Despite being baffled by almost the entire book, since afterall I'm not a physics student and quantum physics and extra dimensional theories are not that easy to comprehend, I gained a few interesting ideas as to how to go about doing my project. Extra dimensions are indeed fascinating and mind-boggling.

I leave you with a quote from the epilogue of the book that struck me.

One never knows where insights will come from, or where they may lead. The pleasure of research is discovering the unexpected.

- Lawrence M. Kauss, Hiding in the Mirror

=====================================
*You can find a link to the photos on the left side of my blog.

The Final

2009-06-05T19:04:00.001+08:00

Week 22: The Final
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players:
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts
- William Shakespeare, As You Like It

As the spotlight on the dancer slowly dims and fades away, it is time to leave the stage. My part has ended, now others will take centre stage.

Ride the Wind

2009-05-31T21:40:00.001+08:00

RIDE THE WIND
- Inoue Masahiro

光り歪む　その度に
新しい空
僕を目覚め　さすように
手招きをする

予想外の　現在地
地図はいらない
とりあえず右　つぎ、左
道は探すさ

それぞれの世界が
僕に求めてくる
通り過ぎずに　戦うこと

Ride the wind 駆け抜けろこのクロニクル
手に入れてゆく　強さのCard
Your eyes will 旅の中きっと見える
目指すべきゴールの場所が…Just keep on walking

急に幕が開くように
旅は始まる
風をつかむ　羽根みたい
僕は流れる

運命が呼ぶなら
僕なら躊躇しない
すべてのシーン　心に写して

Ride the wind この先になにが待ってる？
手がかりは　そお戦うCard
Your eyes will 旅の中見つかるはず
自分が何をするべきが…Just keep on walking

この風を止めないで
動き続けもっと前へ
まだ見えぬ　明日へと踏み出せ

Ride the wind 駆け抜けろこのクロニクル
手に入れてゆく　強さのCard
Your eyes will 旅の中見つかるはず
自分が何をするべきが…
Ride the wind ９つの世界の果て
目指すべきゴールの場所が…Just keep on walking!!
====================
At the moment when the light distorts
I awaken and respond
To the beckoning
Of a new sky

My present location is unknown
And lies outside of the map
I first search the right
And then the left later

In every world
That I pass through
I want to fight

Ride the Wind! Run past this chronicle
And obtain the most powerful Card
In the middle of your journey, your eyes will
Surely be fixed upon the goal destination... Just keep on walking...

When the curtains suddenly open
It informs you that your journey has begun
Like a feather
I flow with the wind

Fate is calling out to me
Without hesitation
I capture the entire scene in my heart

Ride the Wind! What awaits ahead of me?
The clue is the Battle Card
In the middle of your journey, your eyes will discover
The thing you should do... Just keep on walking...

This wind will never stop
And I will always move ahead
I will step into the yet unseen future

Ride the Wind! Run past this chronicle
And obtain the most powerful Card
In the middle of your journey, your eyes will discover
The thing you should do...
Ride the Wind! Aim at the end of the 9 worlds
As the goal destination... Just keep on walking!!

Magic

2009-05-30T22:50:00.001+08:00

Week 21: Magic
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

We are such stuff
As dreams are made on, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep
- William Shakespeare, The Tempest

Roots of the King

2009-05-27T21:56:00.002+08:00

ROOTS OF THE KING
TETRA-FANG

その手に浮かび上がる　紋章が証し
闇の色を集め纏う　オーラのように
Roots of the king… （×4）

守られるべきものは　種族の掟
背く罪は瞬間　裁かれて

世界を滅ぼすという　力のため
現れた純血の継承者

Judge it, King　紡がれてきた　運命のSaga
その腕にゆだねられた
牙を剥いた者は　永遠に奈落を彷徨う
What is real?　圧倒的な
支配を今　大空に仕掛けてくる
揺るぎない存在　Roots of the king…

その椅子に座るのは　唯（ただ）１人だけ
紛い物は虚しく　消えてゆくだけ
Roots of the king… （×4）

闇の祝福の中　歩み続ける
約束されたステージ　登ってく

世界はまだ気付かずに　回り続け…
選ばれた純血の継承者

Judge it, King　受け継がれてた　運命のSaga
この時代黒く染める
牙を剥いた者は　永遠の死を知るのだろう
What is real?　始まったのは
希望じゃなく　絶望と笑っている
揺るぎない自信は　Roots of the king…

光射せば　密かに
影もまた出来るよう
それは決して消せない　Roots of blood

Judge it, King　紡がれてきた　運命のSaga
その腕にゆだねられた
牙を剥いた者は　永遠に奈落を彷徨う
What is real?　圧倒的な
支配を今　大空に仕掛けてくる
風が巻き起こって　その姿あらわす
Roots of the king…!
Roots of the king…!

====================
The crest appearing on your hand is proof
Clad in the colours of darkness like the Aurora
Roots of the King...

What is important is to obey your race's law
Those that defy them face instant judgement

Power that can destroy the world
The pure-blooded successor has appeared

Judge it, King! Spin a Saga of fate
Devote it in your heart
Those who face your fangs will wander in hell eternally
What is real? Overwhelming rule is now waging war with the sky
An unwavering being
Roots of the King...

Only one can sit on that throne
Fakes will just lifelessly disappear
Roots of the King...

Continue walking in the prosperity of darkness
Rising to your promised stage

The world continues spinning, unaware...
Of this chosen pure-blood successor!

Judge it, King! Inherit a Saga of fate
Dye this era in blackness
Those who face your fangs will know what eternal death is
What is real? You don't start with hope, in despair you smile
Such unwavering confidence are the
Roots of the King...

Where there is light, secretly,
Shadows are created
Those are the unerasable Roots of Blood...

Judge it, King! Inherit a Saga of fate
Devote it in your heart

Judge it, King! Spin a Saga of fate
Devote it to your heart
Those who face your fangs will wander in hell eternally
What is real? Overwhelming rule is now waging war with the sky
The wind gathers, and that form appears...
Roots of the King...

Quick Rant

2009-05-26T23:31:00.002+08:00

Loads of work to do, so little time. Holidays' round the corner, so are the exams. I need more time, I'd rather read on quantum physics and the theory of relativity rather than study for some stupid tests.

Cornered

2009-05-24T00:50:00.001+08:00

Week 20: Cornered
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

That's how the past week felt like, cornered and left with no choice, except to struggle through. One more week to holidays!

窓

2009-05-16T22:46:00.001+08:00

Week 19: 窓
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Window.

Just 2 more weeks to the holidays.

タイムベント

2009-05-09T22:52:00.001+08:00

Week 18: タイムベント
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

タイムベント (Time Vent)

- 時間の逆行。 (Going back in time.)

Stuck in a Rut

2009-05-07T16:55:00.001+08:00

My head hurts, my brain can't seem to function, and I've got work to be done. I can't seem to drag myself of the downward spiralling mess, and I just can't seem to get myself going.

I can't stand the reasoning that "You're doing this for your future." The truth is that the thing called "the future" is the most uncertain thing on earth. What is more real, "the present" or "the future"? If anyone is saying the future, go shoot yourself or something. Obviously "the present" has a greater hold on you than "the future". It's irritating to be told that whatever you suffer now is for the better good in "the future". Sometimes, it's just too difficult to try and realise "the future".

仮面の勇者

2009-05-02T21:35:00.001+08:00

Week 17: 仮面の勇者
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

仮面の勇者 (Kamen no Yuusha)
- The Masked Heroes

This is a tribute to my favourite heroes, the Kamen Riders, or "Masked Riders".

When I look back in time, these were the heroes that inspired me, that got me working and happy. Even if they are fiction, they are the ones who brought me joy and hope, even now.

The Awaiting Dragon

2009-04-20T08:57:00.001+08:00

Week 16: The Awaiting Dragon
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Sometimes in life, the good things only come with patience. When the opportune moment comes, only then do you take off.

Lights & Reflections

2009-04-08T23:09:00.001+08:00

Week 15: Lights & Reflections
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

"見上げる星それぞれの歴史が輝いて
星座の様線で結ぶ瞬間始まる Legend" - Journey Through the Decade, Gackt

"I look up at the stars, and see various sagas shining
Like the constellations, only when you connect them with lines does a legend start" - Journey Through the Decade, Gackt

Only when you connect the lines, you see a full picture.

ミラーワールド (Mirror World)

2009-03-30T22:41:00.001+08:00

Week 14: ミラーワールド (Mirror World)
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

This was taken during VJC's Expose 2. This is probably the start to another series of photos which I'm planning and is based around the "mirror stage". The "mirror stage" was a theory proposed by French psychoanalyst and psychiatrist, Jacques Lacan. I hope to read up more on him, and plan for more of such photos to come.

Memory Space

2009-03-27T21:55:00.001+08:00

Week 13: Memory Space
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

The last week was quite a bother. How I wished my brain had a USB port for me to plug in an external hard drive - the amount of history I have to memorise is a killer...

Guided Steps

2009-03-22T00:03:00.001+08:00

Week 12: Guided Steps
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

This was my second night photography 'subject' in that sense, and this is a remake of it.

Everything seems so dark and bleak, but there are those lamp posts out there give you some light along the way. Sometimes, all you have to do is look out for the lights, and climb carefully on.

An Irony?

2009-03-20T22:07:00.001+08:00

Holiday - noun
1. a day fixed by law or custom on which ordinary business is suspended in commemoration of some event or in honor of some person.
2. any day of exemption from work
3. a time or period of exemption from any requirement, duty, assessment, etc.: New businesses may be granted a one-year tax holiday.
4. a religious feast day; holy day, esp. any of several usually commemorative holy days observed in Judaism.
5. Sometimes, holidays. Chiefly British. a period of cessation from work or one of recreation; vacation.

From the above definitions, it seems that the education system in Singapore defines holiday differently.

Holiday - Singaporean definition: Noun
1. A time period that is supposed to allow students to rest, but in truth it's just 24/7 studying for the student.

Journey Through the Decade

2009-03-20T17:39:00.003+08:00

見上げる星　それぞれの歴史が輝いて
星座の様　線で結ぶ瞬間　始まるLegend
Aurora揺らめく時空超えて
飛び込む　迷走するParallel world

On the road　誰も旅の途中　本当の自分自身出会うため
歩き続けるのさ今を　We are all travelers
僕の目の前に広がる　九つの道はいつか重なって
新しい夜明けへと続く道に変わるのだろう
目撃せよ　Journey though the Decade

レンズ越しに切り取った景色を見つめても
真実とは　心の目の中に映るものさ
何処かで　戦いの幕が開き
僕という現実さらうHalation

On the road　旅に出る理由は　世界が滅びる未来変えるため
もっと強く夢を抱け　We are all dreamers
僕の運命は必ず　十度目に立ち上がったその時に
新しい風通り抜ける　道が開くのだろう
目撃せよ　Journey though the Decade

自分が瞬間ごとに決断する　その全てで
未来は理想にも絶望にも変わって行く
だからきっと信じた道　走れ

On the road　誰も旅の途中　本当の自分自身出会うため
歩き続けるのさ今を　We are all travelers
僕の目の前に広がる　九つの道はいつか重なって
新しい夜明けへと続く道に変わるのだろう
目撃せよ　Journey though the Decade

I look up at the stars, and see various sagas shining
Like the constellations, only when you connect them with lines does a legend start
Aurora - Pass through the flickering dimensions
Dive into that straying parallel world...

On the road, everyone is in the middle of a journey to find his own true self
Carry on walking, for we are all travelers
The nine roads before my eyes will someday overlap and
Will probably transform into a road that runs down to a new dawn
Be witness to it... Journey Through the Decade...

When you look beyond the lens that cut off the scenery
The reality will be reflected in the the vision of your heart
In any opening, a struggle will begin
The real me is swept away by halation...

On the road, the reason to travel is to change the imminent destruction of the world
Embracing our dreams even strongly, we are all dreamers
My fate is certainly to stand at the tenth time
Then new roads would probably open, and a new breath will sweep by
Be witness to it... Journey Through the Decade...

Everything has been decided upon at every instant
This is to transform the future from its ideals and hopelessness
So I'll run on the roads that I believe in...

On the road, everyone is in the middle of a journey to find his own true self
Carry on walking, for we are all travelers
The nine roads before my eyes will someday overlap and
Will probably transform into a road that runs down to a new dawn
Be witness to it... Journey Through the Decade...

Hyper Detail Molding Kamen Rider Kiva (Garuru Form)

2009-03-16T15:21:00.004+08:00

Hyper Detail Molding Kamen Rider Kiva (Garuru Form)
Another detailed model which I bought recently. The details are stunning for this 10 cm model. And the best part, it only cost $8. This kind of detail for $8, real worth the money. There's a reason why it's called "Hyper Detail Molding". Even the chains and armour are molded with great detail. The mask is also nicely made.

The Real You

2009-03-11T22:09:00.001+08:00

Week 11: The Real You
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 11: The Real You
"誰も旅の途中、本当の自分自身出会う為..." - Gackt

"Everyone is in the middle of a journey, to find his own true self..." - Gackt

Events over yesterday (10th March) and today (11th March) made me think about what it means to be human, and made me question my own humanity.

What exactly makes a human? Fundamentally, it is the body and the soul. But I think there's more to it, like human emotions. Maybe what someone told me is true, I'm suppressing my emotions too much.

The Magic Window

2009-03-08T20:41:00.001+08:00

Week 10: The Magic Window
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 10: The Magic Window
Looking out in the distant horizon, for hope lies beyond.

A Prayer in the Night

2009-03-02T01:43:00.003+08:00

As of the time I started to type this, it is 1.44am. Sometimes, God works in mysterious and wondrous ways, and works in the most unearthly hours to move the heart of His child. I've been really tired of school lately. I haven't found any strength or motivation to move on lately. It is so tiring to move along with 4 or 5 hours of sleep a day. The amount of time I spend awake in school is so much more than the amount of time I spend awake at home.

I had been lying in bed for the past hour or so, trying to get to sleep. But for some reason, I was just too troubled by all my school work. 3 tests in this week, coupled with all the normal lectures and tutorials I have to do/attend to, it's just too tiring for me. But God has His purpose in preventing me from sleeping, and that is to remind me of His goodness and mercies. Oh how long have I not asked Him for His grace and His strength! Oh how long have I not sought His face in true earnestness!

LORD God Almighty,
Thou art sovereign over all things. Forgive me O LORD of all my wicked sins, forgive me O LORD for forgetting Thy power. I come before Thee, knowing that Thou art almighty, and Thou art in control of everything. Heavenly Father, I'm tired of running on. O LORD how oft in grief have I found relief in Thee. Why O LORD why, why have I forgotten Thy mercies. LORD I thank Thee for Thy chastising hand upon me, for bringing me back into Thy fold. I come before Thee, not as a man, but as Thy humble servant. I pray that Thou wouldst grant me strength to move on in these tiresome times. I pray that even as these trying times should seek to undo me, LORD I pray that Thou would keep me. LORD God almighty, I feel so tired, and I cannot bear all my burdens alone. I'm about to be crushed under the weight of all my burdens. Help me O Father, help me to life up these burdens and teach me to cast all my cares upon Thee. Teach me to pray, teach me to learn Thy truths, teach me never to forsake Thee LORD. Why O God dost Thou put me through all these diffculties? Why, why, why? Show me Thy way O LORD, and make it plain; help me to sing as the hymn writer sang, "O yes, He cares! I know He cares! His heart is touched with my grief! When the days are weary, the long nights dreary, I know my Saviour cares!"

I pray that as I move along in these weeks of school, LORD help me not to forsake my service unto Thee. LORD Thou knowest my troubles, Thou knowest my pain. Thou knowest my sorrow, and Thou knowest my needs. Give me O LORD, the strength to carry on with both my church commitments, and my school commitments. I'm overcome with tiredness to the point that I cannot even sleep. But Thou hast promised, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and I will give you rest." LORD, teach me to carry Thy yoke, and learn from Thee. Teach me I pray, to lean not unto my own understanding, and not to rely on my own strength; but to completely and wholeheartedly place my trust in Thee. LORD God, I submit my life unto Thee. All my talents I surrender unto Thee. All my sorrows and burdens I cast upon Thee. Help me through these trying times O LORD, help me through.

For all these I pray in the name of my blessed LORD and Saviour Jesus Christ,
Amen.

Fusion Works RX-93 ν Gundam

2009-03-01T11:19:00.003+08:00

RX-93 ν Gundam
(from Mobile Suit Gundam: Char's Counterattack)

This is a Fusion Works model, and it cost me S$24. (Yeah, I'm broke right now.) But the amount of sheer detail on this 10cm tall guy is really great. If I were to take a 100% crop of the photo, you would be able to see the sheer detail in the face itself. And the head of the model is merely 1 cm!

Distorted Realities

2009-02-28T22:06:00.001+08:00

Week 9: Distorted Realities
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 9: Distorted Realities

"Why is this world so distorted?" - Setsuna F Seiei, Mobile Suit Gundam 00

The line between the real and the unreal is so thin. Sometimes, the real just seems so unreal, while the unreal just seems so real. Which is which?

The True Self

2009-02-26T23:23:00.004+08:00

"誰も旅の途中、本当の自分自身出会う為" - Everyone is in the midst of a journey to find his own true self...

Sometimes, I wonder to myself, is there reason for me to do everything I'm doing right now? Why on earth am I studying so hard for, and for what reason? I don't see any sense in what I'm studying, and I don't like most of the subjects that I'm taking. I don't enjoy myself in school, and I don't enjoy myself at home either. Sometimes, there are so many things in my mind that I can't really think straight and clearly anymore. People always tell me to think less, but I just can't. Too many things go on in my mind at one time, to the point that my brain overloads. Maybe that's why I have recurrent headaches. I'm just typing whatever that comes to my mind right now, cause right now, my entire brain is in a mess. I have a million and one readings for history, and I'm barely done with my second set of readings.

Sometimes I wonder to myself: "Why bother with church choir? See, now your Saturdays are completely busy, how to do your homework? Why bother with church activities? Why bother with school? Why do you care so much? Why are you bothering about things that most people don't? Why do you have to help people when they don't appreciate you at all? Why study so hard when you don't get any rewards? Sure, studying isn't about rewards, but being human and getting some form of reward would be an encouragement at times. Why pursue photography when you don't have the money? Why make Gunpla when you don't have an airgun and you're not like the professionals? Why do I keep comparing myself with someone else of a higher standard? Sure, it's to improve myself, but I'm still stuck at that lousy level! Why do you bother so much about history, when probably others only rush at the last minute? But then again, what makes you think that others ain't doing extra? Why are you not putting effort into lit and econs? Why is it that your GP is merely average? Why are you so bothered about your math? Why can't you just throw all these thoughts out of the window and out of your mind once and for all? Why do you keep asking why? Why do you not solve the problems? Why do I not have enough time on my hands? Why do I keep thinking in this cyclic motion and just fall deeper into sadness? Maybe you have depression? Maybe you need medication? Maybe you need to trust God more? Maybe you need to stop thinking so much? Why am I thinking of problems everywhere? Why can't I stop thinking? Why? Why? Why?"

Sometimes, I just want to stop. Drop everything I'm holding. Grab my camera. Go on a journey, and never return. Don't be surprised to not see me around. I might just have gone. I'll return when I find the answer.

Real Tired

2009-02-26T20:09:00.001+08:00

I have so many things to do, to the point that I'm going to collapse. I just feel like throwing away everything and walking empty handed.

"Life is a long path to a goal. Drop your heavy luggage and enjoy walking with your hands empty."

Distant Lights

2009-02-22T22:42:00.001+08:00

Distant Lights
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 8: Distant Lights

Hope is there, just blurred and really far away.

Bad Luck...

2009-02-16T20:10:00.000+08:00

You know there are times when things never seem to make sense, and when everything seems to be failing. I’ve had like 4 straight days of ‘bad luck’ already. On Friday, my camera decided to go all PMS-y on me. Well, people were saying that it’s because it was “Friday the 13th”, but that’s just nonsense since I don’t believe in superstition.

But if it really was the Friday the 13th ‘bad luck’, then it wouldn’t explain the ‘bad luck’ that followed on Saturday and Sunday. I mean my plans were all messed up on those two days, and all the stupid amount of work I have to do doesn’t seem to be easing out. Then there’s today. I tell you, the red sun in the morning was like a bad omen. And well, things happened in class today which I shall not elaborate on. And at the end of the day, more work! When will my chain of ‘bad luck’ end?!

Lately everything doesn’t seem to be working out for me. Nothing seems to be registering in my head in school. No wait, nothing seems to be registering in my head at all.

Victory!

2009-02-15T00:01:00.001+08:00

Victory!
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

His tag is number 1, and he came in number 1. Coincidence?

TJC Road Run '09.

希望

2009-02-08T21:57:00.001+08:00

希望
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

希望 - Kibou, "Hope" in Japanese.

Well, life is really crappy right now. But there's hope out there. I guess?

River

2009-02-03T20:16:00.000+08:00

何もかも上手く行かない　もどかしさに
焦る気持ちを押さえて
はがゆさと苛立たしさに　心乱れ
抱え込んだ膝小僧

悔しさをこらえて　涙に震えて
泣いた夜が明ける

そう
確かに君の言う通りだよ
今なら引き返せるけれども
つまらない意地を張り続けてる
歩き始めた以上　諦めない

もう一度　この手にチャンスを…

全てこの胸の中にしまっておこう
夢が叶うまで…

やるせない儚さに　身をゆだねるほど
そんな危うい時代に
あがいても手の届かない　岸を目指し
無我夢中で泳いだ

流れに逆らう　声も上げられない
行き止まりの場所で

そう
愛が全てを助けるとは　思わない
だけど君の微笑み
心を癒すその唇に　立ち上がる勇気を
もらうのさ

もう一度　この手にチャンスを…

川の流れは今日も激しいけれど
君の手は離さない
いつも　この胸の中の愛を信じていよう
夢が叶うまで…

そう
愛が全てを助けるとは　思わない
だけど君の微笑み
心を癒すその唇に　立ち上がる勇気を
もらうのさ

確かに君の言う通りだよ
今なら引き返せるけれども
つまらない意地を張り続けてる
歩き始めた以上　諦めない

もう一度　この手にチャンスを…

川の流れは今日も激しいけれど
君の手は離さない
いつも　この胸の中の愛を信じていよう
夢が叶うまで…

WAKE YOU UP

2009-02-01T21:54:00.002+08:00

心つながる　瞬間があるよ
不思議な感じ　見えない時でも
非常ドア越し　せえので駆け出そう
闇を抜けて　光の出口へ

臆病風　吹き付ける　明日への通路
平気さ僕は　ひとりじゃない

もしも君が挫そうな時も
大丈夫　僕が勇気を送るよ
悲しみも　トラブルも　分かち合えると信じてる
ひとりじゃいつでも待ってた奇跡
君となら起こせるって気付いた
同じ夢　追いかけて　ふたり走り抜けよう

他人（ひと）と冷たく　すれ違うばかり
膝を抱えた　あの日の夕闇
スキマだらけの　僕達が出会って
潤んだ瞳　一緒に笑ったね

涙の雨　うつむかず　今は進めるよ
雨のち晴れを見ていたい

やさしい理想の世界じゃなくても
まっすぐ夢見る翼をくれた
戸惑いもはがゆさも　手を取り合って　消して　行こう
いつか離れて道が途切れても
消えない絆がきっと導く
思い出も未来図も　光る追い風になれ

そうさWAKE YOU UP

もしも君が挫けそうな時も
大丈夫　僕が勇気を送るよ
悲しみも　トラブルも　分かち合えると信じてる
ひとりじゃいつでも待ってた奇跡
君となら起こせるって気付いた
同じ夢　追いかけて　ふたり走り抜けよう

Crossroads of Destiny

2009-01-31T20:58:00.001+08:00

Crossroads of Destiny
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 5: Crossroads of Destiny
This photo is a remake of my old photo. Reason why I called it "Crossroads of Destiny" is because this was probably THE turning point in my pursuit of photography. During Photog Camp in June of 2008, Lincoln and myself were photographing things at night, and that got me interested in Night Photography. It was then that I tried out shooting stuff at night, and this crossroads was one of my first subjects.

I purposefully remade this shot because right now, I'm very confused over everything. Like how hectic and messy all the light trails are, my mind is probably very much like that now.

Bad Day

2009-01-24T00:00:00.000+08:00

With reference to 23rd January.

Day was totally crapped up for me. And I emo-ed out after school.

Looming Presence

2009-01-23T15:25:00.001+08:00

Looming Presence
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 4: Looming Presence
Sonia dragged me on Wednesday to Halus cause she really wanted to see the place. So being the nice guy that I am, I obliged. (See, I'm nice.)

While Sonia and Sam were shooting above ground, I went below the tall grass. The results, stuff that I really like =D

Boredom

2009-01-17T21:56:00.001+08:00

Boredom
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Week 3: Boredom
School has started. My brain is drained. I'm working on something for week 4. Hopefully I'll make up for this week. My brain is fried. T_T

1st Week of School

2009-01-16T20:17:00.002+08:00

Wow, I survived one whole week of school. I can't believe myself. Yay me!

Man, the first week was bad enough, I can't imagine the other weeks. *Sighs*

I'm wondering what to shoot for APAW week 3. I'm thinking "Isolation"? Or maybe "Water Marks"? Or maybe "Rectangles and Squares"? Sigh, so many decisions...

1st Day of J2 Life...

2009-01-12T20:30:00.002+08:00

It's rare that I talk about the day. But I just had to man. I mean c'mon, it's like a milestone in life (right, who am I kidding?)

Today was an UTTER WASTE OF TIME. Period. The moment I stepped into College and smelt the air of school, I wanted to step out. Yeah, that was how bad it was (no, not the smell, the thought and the fact of going back to school lah!)

First period, Civics, aka let's sit down and talk and catch up. Then we had a principal's address and college rules and blah blah blah what not (all the regular stuff that you get on the first day of school). And school was over at 10am. Can you believe it? I went to school for that?!?! Why did I even go?

Tomorrow's timetable looks crappy as well. First, we have math lecture. Then we have econs lecture. And school's over for open house... How exciting. You can just smell the excitement.

I'm not done with quite a bit of work. Mundane life is back... Sleep at 1am, wake up at 5.30am. Cycle goes on till holidays. Sighs...

Halus Pano

2009-01-08T21:28:00.001+08:00

Halus Pano (Colour)
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

APAW 2009, Week 2.
Title: Reflections

*Thanks to Sam who brought me! =D

Random Thoughts. Okay, maybe not so random.

2009-01-06T15:37:00.003+08:00

It's been a while since I seriously built a model. I'm thinking of modifying my GN-001 Gundam Exia into a GN-001RE Gundam Exia Repair.

And I still have 1/100 Red Astray, 1/144 Psycho Gundam (yes, they are more than a year old now), 1/144 GN Arms (yes, it's a year old), 1/144 Raider Gundam, SD Zeta Gundam, 1/35 Lancelot Air Calvary.

That's a total of 7 unbuilt models! And I'm thinking about getting an SD Exia and modifying it to a SD Exia Repair as well.

Why are the holidays almost over already?

Adjustments

2009-01-03T23:55:00.001+08:00

Adjustments
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

There are times in life when things seem to be too cold or too hot. If the situation is unfavourable, just get up, and make some adjustments. You might just feel better.

A Long Way to Go!

2009-01-01T23:39:00.001+08:00

A Long Way to Go!
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

2009 is finally here. At the start of each year, people tend to make resolutions. Well, the day is almost over as of the time I'm posting this. I can't think of any other resolution, except that I want to walk closer with God this year.

I know that this year will be different because of someone whom God has brought into my life. (No, not in that sense which you are thinking in.) But really, I'm thankful to God for that person, someone who actually helped me find an answer to the question which has been bothering me for half my life.

Oh yeah, the day is almost over, but still, Happy Birthday Sarah! =D

=========
Almighty God,

Grant me a passion for souls, a passion for the souls of the youths. Forgive me O LORD of my sins, but use me for Thy glory, be it in school or in church. I'm unworthy to be used by Thee, but Thou has graciously saved me and willing to use me. Help me O God I pray. Bless me in my studies, but more importantly, bless me in my walk with Thee. Keep me near to Thee! Draw me nearer to Thee O LORD!

I pray for all the youths in Gethsemane. LORD, bless us all. Help us all to be good testimonies in our respective schools and places where we go to. Help all the youths to love Thee more, to walk closer with Thee, to win more souls for Thee! Help all the youths I pray, keep us all. Forgive me, and pardon me O LORD. O how unworthy I am! Forgive me, restore me!

The year ahead is long, and LORD I know it will be tiring. But LORD, keep me and guide me. Guide me O Thou great Jehovah! Help me to never forsake Thee. Help all the youths to never forsake Thee.

LORD, I dread the new school term. I'm afraid, so very afraid. Forgive me of my human weaknesses, but help me to continually serve Thee, knowing that Thou art the God who made all things from nothing. So help me LORD, to trust in Thee evermore.

In Jesus most blessed and holy name,
AMEN.

Beyond the Sunset

2008-12-31T11:19:00.003+08:00

Well, it's the last day of the year 2008, and time has so quickly flew past. As I reflect upon the year 2008, I cannot help but feel God's mercies and graces aiding me through all the days of my life. It seems that every year, different troubles will plague God's children, but at the same time, God grants sufficient grace to pull through the year.

As I recall every event in the year (okay, at least the major events since my memory is failing me these days), God has been with me since. From my awaiting of the O Level results, to my choosing of schools, and even through this entire year, God has been merciful and has been showing me the way, guiding me through. I never thought I could have pulled through 2008, but nothing is impossible with God. Sure, I may be capable of doing well enough, but I know that I'm not capable of doing well, at least not without God's help. I really could not have done well for my EOYs without divine help.

Well, I really don't know what to say at times. But I thought I should just pen down my thoughts somewhere, and maybe look back at it someday. 2009 is only half a day away (from the time I'm posting), and I'm really troubled by the A Levels next year. (Yeah, I know I shouldn't be worrying, but still, it's a natural human reaction.) I just pray that I would not fail in serving God, even if it means failing in school. With all humbleness, I pray that God will lead me through the next year, and all the remaining days of my life.

There's a reason why I chose the title to be "Beyond the Sunset". This is because I want to remind myself of the hymn, "Beyond the Sunset".
Beyond the sunset, O blissful morn,
When with our Saviour heav'n is begun.
Earth's toiling ended, O glorious dawning;
Beyond the sunset, when day is done.

I need to remind myself that my time on this earth is temporal, and I should always seek God's will in my life first.
==========

Almighty, merciful Heavenly Father,

LORD God, forgive me for the sins that I have committed in 2008. Forgive me O LORD, for time and time again straying from Thee. Forgive me O LORD, of all my human weaknesses. Restore me O LORD, restore me to Thy fold.

As the new year dawns, help me to seek Thy face evermore; to ask of Thy graces evermore. Help me to always trust in Thee, to trust in Thee to guide me through both my studies and commitment in church. LORD God Almighty, Thou created everything out of nothing; nothing is impossible for Thee.

I pray that I would not neglect my commitments in church in the pursuit of my studies. Chastise me O LORD, if I ever forget. I pray for the youths, many of them will be taking their O Levels in 2009, LORD I pray that Thou wilt be merciful unto them, and bless them in their studies. Help them to always seek Thee in their time of need. I pray that the youths would be regular in attending GYBH. Help them to understand O Father, that Thy word is life, and everything else is but loss. Help all the youths to be regular in their attendance, so that they will not miss out on all the spiritual blessings on Saturday afternoons.

I pray for those who are receiving their O Level results, LORD bless their efforts during the year 2008. Give them results that would enable them to take the course that they would like to take. I pray that Thou wilt grant all the O Level students wisdom to choose wisely which route they should take in 2009, whether they should be in a JC or a polytechnic. As Thou has comforted and guided me in my time of need, I pray the same for the other youths.

O LORD, keep all the youths I pray, keep all the youths from the temptation of the world. Keep us O LORD from the attack of the evil one. In this time of peril, temptation is everywhere! Grant all the youths discernment, to keep away from evil, and to keep in the narrow way. Bless us O LORD, bless us. Keep us from the evil one, help us to remain focused on Thee, and never lose sight of our final destination. Keep us from falling I pray.

In Jesus most blessed and holy name,
AMEN.

The Radiance of the Sun

2008-12-30T16:30:00.001+08:00

The Radiance of the Sun
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Re-edit from Church Camp. I prefer this over the previous upload.

For photos from Combined Youth Games, wait till 1st January. I hit my upload limit for this month...

Encouragement

2008-12-22T14:48:00.001+08:00

I'm searching for answers to the many questions I have in my head. The funny thing is, the more answers I seek, the more questions appear. The more questions I have, the more answers I need, and even more questions pop up. Destiny is a funny thing; seems that in life, more questions than answers can be found. There are times when you feel so troubled and confused about life, and really at a complete loss as to what to do. Right now, life seems to be in a big mess for me. Feeling really troubled, I really needed someone to say nice things, or a word of encouragement to me.

I'm really worried for next year. I'm J2 next year, that means the A Levels. I'm still in Youth Committee next year, that means more work. These two things are going to be hard to balance, and I know it. That's the problem with human beings, we think too much, and then we worry about the future. And when we worry, we feel troubled.

I was feeling real troubled last night, and thank God for the encouragement I received from some friends. I mean someone told me that I seemed like the kind that would lead in Youth, and I was really quite... apprehensive (dunno if this correctly describes what I'm thinking) because I didn't feel like that kind of a person. I really couldn't think much about being a good leader, since I haven't done much for Youth this year because I was so stretched in school. I doubt myself so much. But this was what a friend told me: "You have in some ways, this year especially, been an example to me. I don't believe in looks. But I see you in church, I see you helping in the AV system, I see you going out to cover church events, I see you able to talk to both the adults and the teens, I see you kind to the kids, and I've seen you mature beyond the angst that plagued you in secondary school. I know you've a desire to serve. To me that's someone who could lead the youths. It's not about ability in the end, it's the desire to serve. and you have that desire. And hey, I think God has granted you the ability to lead, to make the right choices, to consult the right people, to even while you struggle with your own spiritual life be able to talk with other youths about their issues and stuff."

I really thank God for the encouragement that he gave me through my friends. With that, I pray that next year I'd be able to serve Him even more next year.

Lights and Stairs

2008-12-10T11:11:00.001+08:00

Lights and Stairs
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

A night photo from Bintan Agro Beach Resort and Spa. In fact, the only night photo. I was too tired by night, and I couldn't afford to lose sleep. But this captured my attention, and I made sure that I took this photo or I would regret.

Enjoy =D

Strangers & Pilgrims

2008-12-09T17:57:00.001+08:00

Strangers & Pilgrims
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

“We’re a pilgrim band that’s headed for the glory land of light…”

“Strangers and Pilgrims” – the theme for the church camp this year. I didn’t have much of an idea when I first saw the theme for this year’s church camp, so with much anticipation I attended the camp, in hope of learning more.

Every year church camp is a time of spiritual revival; the revival for me this year was ‘stronger’ than before. Now that 2008 is almost over, and when I reflect upon the year, I noticed how little time I had spent with God, and how much I concentrated on my school work. I was reminded during the camp, with what someone in the church had told me earlier on in the year: don’t be distracted by school work. Again, I committed the same mistake as I did last year. “Strangers and Pilgrims” was a timely reminder, a reminder that my time on this earth is but temporal.

In Rev Quek’s words, a ‘stranger’ is an alien who is in a foreign land, and a ‘pilgrim’ is a stranger who has stayed in the land for a long time. A stranger and a pilgrim look forward to a brighter hope, the ‘glory land of light’. As a Christian, one must not be a Permanent Resident (PR) of this sin filled earth, let alone be a citizen.

“As a pilgrim I look for a better country, which my LORD is preparing for me…”

The morning devotions were preached by Rev Reggor. The devotions were reminders of God’s unfailing mercies, and God’s infinite power. Indeed God has been merciful to me throughout the entire year, and has showcased His power throughout the year. Life in Junior College (JC) hasn’t been a bed of roses. Being a rather lazy person, 2008 was the first time in years that I actually found it so difficult to study. The amount of content for all the subjects, they are just too much to handle. If not for God’s grace and mercies, I would not have been able to cope with all the work.

The main messages were preached by Rev Quek. Rev Quek taught us from the book of Genesis, from the life of a great pilgrim, Abraham. Constant emphasis was placed on the need to have a changed mindset to the world. Hebrews 11:13 states that in order to have a changed mindset, we need to be ‘persuaded’, need to ‘embrace’, and need to ‘confess’. We need to be persuaded to leave the worldly pleasures, and embrace God’s salvation. And we need to confess our decision through our actions. Without God, no one can be a stranger or a pilgrim. Abraham had little of the Word, since there was no written word (the Bible) during his time, and all he had was the voice of God. God told him to leave his hometown and become a stranger and a pilgrim, and he willingly obeyed. Much faith was needed on Abraham’s part to believe that he would be a father of the great nation of Israel! Rev Quek’s messages emphasized on the need for the Christian to daily depend on God to make godly choices. Godly choices are not the best choices; neither are they the first choices. The decisions that a Christian make would impact both him and those around him, as well as his own eternity. It is only through a close walk with God that godly choices can be made. Abraham forgot to consult God, and made wrong choices. But his return to God was a godly choice in itself.

“There’ll be glory for me at the end of this road. There’ll be glory that outshines my troubles here…”

Rev Koshy preached in the evening messages, on the Christian’s glorious hope. Everything that happens is for God’s glory, even men’s salvation! There is inexplicable glory in heaven awaiting the Christian; glory that will outshine all the troubles on this earth. When a Christian finally returns to his true home, all the trials on earth would seem so small, and all the troubles are all nothing.

“Even so, come, Lord Jesus!”

Oh God, when my time on this earth is over, take me home! I want to see Thy glory in its full majesty! May Thou return, as quickly as possible! I cannot bear my burdens alone. I want to go home, to my final resting place.
==========

Now on a less serious note, I think my cholestrol levels shot up real high. Over the 5 days, I ate close to 80 prawns. Poor Sarah Lee who sat beside me for most of my meals... Apparently she's traumatized by my eating habits. =P

Roses

2008-12-08T15:05:00.001+08:00

Roses
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Shot of roses from Prom Night. I was bored to death that night, and the next day was church camp. I shouldn't have gone to shoot that night!

Anyways, selective colouring FTW!

The Stairs

2008-12-07T18:37:00.001+08:00

The Stairs
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

My first 'abstract' shot. More to come in the future.

P.S. This was taken during class chalet.

I'M BACK!

2008-12-06T23:02:00.002+08:00

I'm back from Church Camp! This year is arguably the most tiring year. JC life is tiring, and church camp is always a time to relax. But this year, being the official photographer, it's so tiring.

Full report will come another day, along with photos. I need to catch up on sleep. Very tired.

No one ever knows...

2008-11-29T23:26:00.000+08:00

... the sound I make.

No seriously.

2008-11-28T21:34:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I wish the world would just stop spinning for a day.

Just one day.

Brain

2008-11-27T20:11:00.001+08:00

It hurts. Really badly.

Christmas Wishlist

2008-11-24T20:58:00.002+08:00

Here's my Christmas wishlist! =D

AF 85mm f/1.8D
AF-S 14-24mm f/2.8G ED
AF-S 24-70mm f/2.8G ED
AF-S Micro VR 105 f/2.8G
A new handphone
A new laptop (with 3GB RAM)
A new ballhead for my tripod
NO HOMEWORK!

Can anyone give any of the above to me? Afterall, Christmas is supposedly about the 'spirit of giving'? Or you could donate to Matthew's Camera Fund. Either way would be nice. =D

What Big Eyes You Have!

2008-11-23T22:59:00.001+08:00

What Big Eyes You Have
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Picture of Jorim taken today with my new 50mm f/1.8! =D

Anyways, I was like looking through the Nikon lenses. And since the DX lenses aren't that great, I skipped that whole portion on DX lenses, and looked at the Standard lenses, Wide Angle zoom lenses, and Standard Zoom lenses.

Stuff that would be nice to own:
- AF 85mm f/1.8D
- AF-S 14-24mm f/2.8G ED
- AF-S 24-70mm f/2.8G ED

Stuff above that I can afford while I'm still schooling:
- AF 85mm f/1.8D (and this will take me the whole of next year to save up; but it's another great potraiture lens!)

Of course, I could go for the DX lenses, but neh, their performance ain't that great. Well, there's 2 years of NS to save up for, and who knows, maybe Nikon might release something even crazier, like AF-S VR 24-70mm f/2.8G IF-ED. Now that would be sweet.

Intelligence

2008-11-21T16:21:00.000+08:00

It's a privilege.

And I'm not gonna use it.

Solidarity

2008-11-17T22:27:00.002+08:00

Knowing the harshness of being alone,
Understanding the pain now;
No matter what comes attacking,
You'll be able to bear it without running away.

Everything is tested with time. Time and circumstance will either make or break you.

Looking Ahead

2008-11-16T22:13:00.001+08:00

Looking Ahead
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Joash! Took this last Sunday or 2 Sundays ago, can't recall.

Noisy

2008-11-15T10:14:00.000+08:00

Just shut up. Seriously.

SLC

2008-11-13T21:48:00.002+08:00

It was tiring, but fun.

Don't be afraid of change,
You're just losing sight of your future self.

CAMP BLUES

2008-11-10T22:49:00.000+08:00

I'm not looking forward to the next 3 days.

Dreams

2008-11-09T22:37:00.002+08:00

If you have a dream which you wish would come through,
Then there would have been days you believed that it would come through...
When you're lost, I'm sure that the strength of your feelings will guide you;
The future you wish for is already in your hands...

Strength

2008-11-08T21:59:00.004+08:00

Ever wondered what makes true strength?

The strong one with his strength,
Will proclaim "I'm fairly strong."
... ...
A strong heart and a strong wish
With time shall develop into something unrivalled...

If we had met in a dream...

2008-11-06T20:35:00.004+08:00

If we had met in a dream...
By 175R
--------------------
If we had met in a dream,
What words would I utter when I embrace you?
I won't let anyone interrupt
This midsummer night...

When I close my eyes,
I would see you in my dreams tonight;
I don't feel tired tonight, and even forget that morning is coming.
If we were to meet,
What words would I utter when I embrace you?
I won't let anyone interrupt this slow night...

Dreams, you, reality and me would be
The completion of a deeply emotional novel of my life.
Most of my dreams don't dome true,
Sometimes I'm just stuck deeply in thought.
If I can only have one-third of life,
I would just have to enjoy it and not waste it away.

When I close my eyes,
I would see you in my dreams tonight;
I don't feel tired tonight, and even forget that morning is coming.
If we were to meet,
What words would I utter when I embrace you?
I won't let anyone interrupt this slow night...

Nevertheless, in spite of the difficulties,
My thoughts still reach out to you.
If I can only have two-thirds of life,
I just want to meet you.

Even if it's just this once,
Just tonight give me a dream of you
And I'd surely be able to say goodbye to my once cowardly self.
If we were to ever meet,
What last song will we dance to till morning?
I won't let anyone interrupt this midsummer night...

When I completely awaken from my dream,
It's show time for you & me, together with you, the two of us dancing all night.

When you & me awaken completely...
--------------------

This is for my friends. I don't know how they put up with me for the past one year, but yeah they did! =D

IT'S OVER!

2008-11-05T17:16:00.000+08:00

YES! NO MORE PW FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!

Yes Xiuqing, I'll be less emo next year. =P

ONE MORE DAY!

2008-11-04T21:07:00.002+08:00

One more day... Or even less!

I can just smell liberation...

School's Out... NOT!

2008-10-29T18:02:00.004+08:00

Timetable for the non-existant holidays...

30th October - Chinese A Level Papers @ 8am (Don't remind me why I didn't take my Higher MT paper in Sec 4... DON'T, I'M WARNING YOU!)
3rd November - OP practice in school @ 8am... (8am... T_T)
5th November - Actual OP @ 8am...
6th and 7th November - Possibility of getting called up by MOE to present... AGAIN! (They just love to see us suffer...)
10th - 13th November - Leadership Congress and SLC

So technically, I'm not free till after the 13th of November... Then again with the amount of holiday homework:

GP: 2 Comprehension Practices and 6 ~~Ass~~Essay Outlines
Econs: Marketisation CSQ and Reasearch-cum-Essay-cum-Presentation
Lit: Read P&P, Tempest
History: UN Research, SEA questions/answer plans
Math: A whole lot of Math questions...

The bold ones are the real killers... 2 research papers is no joke, even though it's done in a group (points at the cursed PW)...

And by end November, I would know if NUS would approve my H3 research paper... If it's approved, I gotta start doing research as well...

I'm kinda thankful to God for enabling me not to attend the Temasek Internship Programme. With the amount of ~~crap~~ homework I have to do, I think if I went for the internship, I wouldn't be able to do any of my work.

Well, at least there's class chalet (I'll be the unofficial official photographer =D) on the 26th and 27th November. And there's church camp to look forward too, 1st to 6th December! (Yeah, I'd be uncontactable then, so don't miss me or anything!) Rest assured that I will come back with photos, a lot of them. =D

No wonder my Civics Tutor said that your holidays are only when you're 6 feet under...

Solus Christus!

2008-10-28T20:39:00.001+08:00

Solus Christus
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

"Solus Christus!" means "Christ Alone!"

This was one of the 5 reformation slogans during the 16th Century Reformation movement. It began on the 31st of October, 1517, when Martin Luther pinned his 95 Theses onto the doors of the Roman Catholic church in Wittenburg, Germany. Luther's 95 Theses pointed out the heresies and errors of the Roman Catholic practices, and this sparked off a wave a reformist movements in the 16th Century.

Now, every last Sunday of October, Lutheran churches will celebrate the Reformation movement, and this day has come to be known as Reformation Sunday.

This year, my church (Gethsemane Bible-Presbyterian Church) celebrated Reformation Sunday with a Reformation Cantata, entitled "Solus Christus".

The 5 Slogans:
- Sola Scriptura: Scripture Alone
- Sola Gratia: Grace Alone
- Sola Fide: Faith Alone
- Solus Christus: Christ Alone
- Soli Deo Gloria: Glory to God Alone

Why I got into Night Photography

2008-10-27T22:40:00.001+08:00

Why I got into Night Photography

To begin, let me just define ‘night photography’. Basically, the general consensus to night photography is that the photographs are taken between dusk and dawn. Basically it means that when people are asleep, you’re awake like some weird nocturnal creature. I dare say that night photography is probably one of the least ventured into areas of photography. Often you hear people claim that they are ‘nature photographers’, ‘wedding photographers’ or ‘street photographers’, but it’s hard to find someone who actually claims to be a ‘night photographer’ (by the way, ‘hard to find’ does not equate to ‘zero’). People often pack their camera gear after sunset and head home for dinner, in turn neglecting what the night can offer.

Nonetheless, there is growing attention given to night photography lately, and many are beginning to venture into night photography. The reason for this growing trend? The birth of the modern day Digital Single Lens Reflex (aka DSLR) cameras; going digital means you can afford to keep retaking your shots without wasting film, and deleting all your ‘failed’ attempts on the spot. Thank God for modernisation! It seems that going digital makes people more willing to try new stuff out, so modernisation is good! (Stop being a Luddite!)

I believe that the perception of people towards night photography is that night photography requires much skill and is very difficult. As in any form of photography, skill is a necessity, unless you’re just a ‘point-and-shoot’ kind of person, but that is beside the point. Nonetheless, I dare claim that night photography is in fact one of the easiest form of photography, that is after you get the hang of it. Usually, your subject would have the same amount of light (i.e. the lighting conditions for your subject does not vary greatly). This basically means that when you don’t like the photographs from one of your shoots, you could always head back down to that same location, and chances are that the lighting conditions would be the same. Having that same amount of lighting for your subject would thus allow you to keep re-shooting the subject.

If you’re shooting in the city, chances are that the lights will make the place look like day, but your lighting conditions would remain somewhat similar. For example, if you’re shooting a skyscraper, and you’re unhappy with the shot, you could always take your time and change your camera settings to get your ideal shot. When you’re at home doing post processing, and you still can’t find any photographs that you like, you can still head down to the same skyscraper and take it again. I mean it’s almost impossible for the entire skyscraper to be relit in a different colour, unless the government seeks to like remodel and relight the whole city or something.

However, lighting conditions do change when you consider shooting nature photographs in the middle of the night. Nature photography at night is dependent on the brightness of the moon, or whether the moon is present at all in the first place, the presence of clouds, the weather conditions etc. I mean the sky at 8pm is very different at 1am. Don’t believe me? Stay up late one night and take pictures of the sky at that time. Don’t want to stay up at night? Then you can’t be a night photographer. (It’s obvious why you can’t be a night photographer if you are not willing to stay up late right?)

Now on to the real stuff, what really got me into night photography? I think night photography is the most interesting form of photography; at least it is true in my reality. (I wouldn’t really care about other people’s reality would I?) Night photography offers one key effect: seeing things in a different light, literally. Often, if not always, things that you see in the morning or in the afternoon, would turn out drastically different than when you see them at night. It is the night that brings out the true nature of creatures, revealing the werewolves amongst the humans. (Wait, this doesn’t make sense here.) What I mean is that in night photography, the contrast between ‘dark’ and ‘light’, ‘dull’ and ‘bright’, ‘evil’ and ‘good’ (wait, not this one either) is strongly presented. The brighter areas are emphasized in night photography, but the shadows are also much stronger in night photographs as well. What night photography does is that it effectively brings out obvious contrasts, which are less obvious in most other forms of photography. (Note again that I’m not discounting the contrast that other forms of photography entail, but what I’m saying is that contrast is brought out most strongly in night photographs. Then again, this is my opinion, that’s why the title is ‘Why I got into Night Photography’ and not ‘Why Other People got into Night Photography’.)

Besides seeing things in a different light, night photography enables the photographer to play god. Then again, other forms of photography also allow the photographer to play god, so what is so special and unique about night photography? Simple, artificial lighting. This would be the only form of photography where the photographer has control over all sorts of weird lighting and effects. What I mean here, is that the photographer has the ability to create (literally) different effects with lights. Ever heard of light painting? Basically the photographer ‘paints’ light for the photograph, and creates certain effects that can only be captured in the dark. (Of course, you can establish similar effects with a studio, turn off all the lights and ALAKAZAM, you have a dark room. But that isn’t really fun isn’t it?)

I think a most beautiful thing about night photography is the beauty that the night offers. The night is often associated with images of coldness, emptiness, and lifelessness. Those are extreme words in my opinion. What the night offers is serenity and calmness, very much different from the hustle and bustle of the afternoon. What night photography does, is that it captures this stillness in a succinct manner, and makes the ‘lifeless’ night become very much alive. (This is with respect to nature photography in the night.) Of course, if you’re doing photography in the city, that’s a different scenario, cause ‘the city never sleeps’. Like seriously, it’s all bright at night in the city, so it’s not really still. So what’s there to shoot in the city at night? Like I mentioned above, night photography in the city is to capture the pretty neon lights and artificial lights.

But like any form of photography, there are night photographs that have been ‘shot to death’. So, what to do when the scene has been ‘shot to death’? I think this is where all hardcore photographers will know what I’m going to say, find a different angle, a different perspective to shoot your subject. Focus on the minute details, such as the weird looking gate, the crack in the wall a corner of the window etc. Don’t always go for THAT wide angle shot whereby every single other photographer on earth has probably taken that picture as well. Like in any form of photography, night photography is about art and expression. What the photographer seeks to do, is to record a mere story of the scene.

As a closing note, here’s an article by Steve Harper with regards to night photography (http://www.thenocturnes.com/resources/harper.html). After reading this essay, if you feel like grabbing your tripod and camera and going out at 2am to photograph the night life by all means go and explore the night! People often say ‘seeing is believing’; so similarly, you got to go experience shooting in the night to understand what joy it gives!

Zion Nights

2008-10-25T12:59:00.002+08:00

Well, this place was named Zion by Samuel. We (Sam, Sonia and myself) went to shoot yesterday afternoon/evening. I'm not a big-time fan of nature photography, but I really needed to destress from school crap. Shooting always helps to destress. =D

This was taken about 15 mins after the sun set if my memory doesn't fail me.

Ups-and-Downs

2008-10-23T22:32:00.004+08:00

Well well well, since I have no photos, I shall just say how stuff in life is coming along...

1. PW sucks. Well, it sucked then, and it still sucks now. So no difference actually.
2. Waiting for H3 appeal results. ALL WILL BE REVEALED TOMORROW! (I hope?)
3. I'm having fun with my camera *as usual*, so not much difference here either.
4. I have a headache for 2 straight days. ARGH! Yes, it's still hurting.
5. Chinese A Levels are around the corner, 1 week! 1 more week, and Chinese would be like the dinosaurs, burried 10,000 ft under the ground! Do note that I don't take geography, and the value of '10,000 ft' is completely made up. So don't quote me. Yes, DON'T QUOTE ME!

LASTLY, I'm typing an essay on 'Why I got into Night Photography,' so stay tuned for that. Yes, I'll blog it here. No, I'm not gonna publish a book. No, it's not tips on night photography, it's what made me interested in night photography. Look, stop asking and just wait patiently for me to complete my writing! Sheesh, people these days, no patience at all!

Night Photography Checklist

2008-10-17T20:35:00.003+08:00

Checklist... (i.e. my plans for the holidays, if they ever exist...)

1. CBD Area

Esplanade
Old Supreme Court
Singapore River

2. Bedok Reservoir
3. Changi Boardwalk
4. Singapore EXPO carpark
5. Botanic Gardens
6. Fort Canning Park... maybe?
7. Pulau Ubin... maybe?

Of course, there are some places near my home which I plan to shoot.

EDIT: Yeah, added Singapore EXPO Carpark. If you're wondering why that carpark, it's because I want an empty and open carpark to shoot at night. The carparks near my home are ALWAYS filled, but I want a shot with an empty feel. Whereas the one at EXPO is always... empty...

On an MRT

2008-10-14T23:29:00.002+08:00

While the title seems to suggest that something really cool happened on an MRT (you know, those kind of crappy stuff like not giving way to pregnant women that goes onto STOMP!), it's a totally fake title. It's just me and another of my poems again.

Broken Chords
For me, today was sad,
The experiences that I had,
But I know that tomorrow I would be glad.

The thing I most dread
Has occured and I've gone mad,
For me, today was sad.

The life which I once had
Was suddenly in lack.
But I know that tomorrow I would be glad.

I talk to the dead
Thinking it's life instead
For me, today was sad.

Though dejected and oppressed
And feeling unduly stressed
But I know that tomorrow I would be glad.

Relations are like broken chords, disrupted;
But they need to be mended,
For me, today was sad,
But I know that tomorrow I would be glad.

National Museum

2008-10-14T12:55:00.001+08:00

National Museum
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Flickr updated! Another night outing I went for.

Ah-ah Ultra Hero!

2008-10-09T22:43:00.003+08:00

Believe ~Don't Give Up!~
KIYOSHI
==========
The light of hope from the ends of the galaxy,
Searches for the yet unseen future,
And it's always beside you.

Stronger and stronger, Let's Go Fight!
Let us higher and higher fly!
To not give in to opposing winds,
That is our vow.

The present is not all there is,
The pain will transform into the power of love.

Let us believe without feeling lost,
That our courage will fulfill our wishes;
Continuing without end,
Searching for the yet unseen future
Ah-ah Ultra Hero!

Kinder and kinder, so kind;
More and more, the blue sky;
Who do you want to be with
In this new era?

You are not alone,
The sadness will transform into the power of love.

Open the doors of our hearts in the face of approaching fear
For we have friends;
Continuing endlessly,
We aim for a distant future
Ah-ah Ultra Hero!

The present is not all there is,
The pain will transform into the power of love.

Let us believe without feeling lost,
That our courage will fulfill our wishes;
Continuing without end,
Searching for the yet unseen future
Ah-ah Ultra Hero!

Open the doors of our hearts in the face of approaching fear
For we have friends;
Continuing endlessly,
We aim for a distant future
Ah-ah Ultra Hero!

*This was the ending theme for the Ultraman Mebius movie in 2006.

Money...

2008-10-05T12:02:00.003+08:00

It's the thing that I need most at the moment...

1. Money for Photography books...
2. Money to pay my parents for the tripod and cable release...
3. Money for 50mm f/1.8 lens...
4. Money to get a Sigma 24-70mm lens... (next year that is...)

Anyone who would like to make a kind donation? Please? =D

Spikeball

2008-10-01T22:13:00.001+08:00

Spikeball
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Well, I got bored. So I grabbed my tripod and camera and went down for a walk...

Took a few photos, but didn't really like some of them. So that's why this is the only upload.

Plan to go down to CBD area at night some time soon. And maybe Bedok Reservoir and Boardwalk (Changi).

IT'S OVER!

2008-09-30T18:19:00.000+08:00

THE EXAMS ARE WAY OVER!!

I hate PW.

One more....

2008-09-29T12:47:00.001+08:00

Seriously. The wait is killing me... One more paper...............

Literature Revision

2008-09-28T19:53:00.003+08:00

I was reading through Fall of the House of Usher...

Stuff describing Usher:

"his ordinary manner had vanished"
"unceasingly agitated mind"
"an evidently restrained hysteria in his whole demeanour"
"a sickly smile quivered about his lips"

No wonder some of my friends called me Usher. That's... disturbing...

==========

Othello Revision; Main themes in Othello

Appearance and Reality
Male Honour & Military Code
Jealousy
Male Patriachy

I'm only gonna do the essay question, unless the context is like super easy... ZZZ...

Struggling........

2008-09-26T19:20:00.001+08:00

2 more to go... Literature and History (Southeast Asia)...

I WILL SURVIVE THIS NONSENSE!!

On a side note,
I HAVE MY TRIPOD AND CABLE RELEASE! WOOT!

EXAM システム!

2008-09-25T13:29:00.003+08:00

EXAMS are terrible I tell you! They suck the life from you!

I'm gonna bed now. Super sleepy. When I wake up, it's gonna be Math intensive... And gonna get started on History P2 and/or Lit as well. *Higher probability of 'OR' though*

I need more time!

EXAM システム! 発動!

Me is going insanes

2008-09-24T17:24:00.000+08:00

YARS, za posts' titlez tellz it allz..................... Going inzanes.......

Camera Equipment

2008-09-22T19:45:00.003+08:00

I'm thinking in my head right now... Should I get more camera equipment?

Wants:
- AF 50mm f/1.8D
- AF-S NIKKOR 14-24mm f/2.8G ED
- AF-S NIKKOR 24-70mm f/2.8G ED

Thoughts:
- I have no money. At best by the end of the year, I can only afford the AF 50mm f/1.8D and cable release.
- I have my reservations regarding the AF 50mm f/1.8D. Nikon will be releasing a AF-S 50mm f/1.4G at the end of this year or early next year.
- AF-S 14-24mm f/2.8G ED and AF-S 24-70mm f/2.8G ED: Two REALLY expensive lenses. If I were to get them, I'd probably have to save up over NS or something.

Yippee! Bought the tripod and cable release. =D

Please...

2008-09-22T17:33:00.002+08:00

What I wanted was a yesterday,
But all I had was a today,
What I really need is a tomorrow.

Please don't stop the tracks of time.

-Why doesn't anyone understand?-

Being Emo - My Twin

2008-09-21T22:18:00.001+08:00

Being Emo - My Twin
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Yes, I have a twin. Your eyes are not deceiving you!

And yes, both of us are emo...

*100th Post!

答えは聞いてない

2008-09-21T00:46:00.001+08:00

I can't hear your answer!

That's how I feel right now...

Depression

2008-09-19T16:57:00.001+08:00

Depression
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

How everything looks to me right now...

I'm going insane over the promotional exams. And Geopolitics sounds fun. Maybe I should try for it.

Full Moon

2008-09-15T22:12:00.001+08:00

Full Moon
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Second post with regards to night photography.

Now back to the mugging table.

Neglected Stairs

2008-09-14T00:53:00.001+08:00

Neglected Stairs
Originally uploaded by zeta_gundam

Well, first of the few night photos. More to come, stay tuned!

Off to mug for promos! Ta~!

Announcement!

2008-09-08T22:03:00.002+08:00

Well, if you remembered the post on Fireworks!, you would remember me mentioning that I have a second reason for shooting the fireworks. The main aim for me going out to shoot fireworks was to actually seek locations in the city area to shoot the night scenes in Singapore.

Yes, I'm officially, or unofficially, announcing my plans - I want to embark on a journey of night photography. The night life (no not the kind along red-light districts) holds many secrets and thrills. This would be in line with the photography experience - photography is not about the photo, but rather HOW you get the photo you want.

I'm gonna start in the holidays (i.e. November and December), so until now, people who bother about me, wait patiently.

Questions

2008-09-06T19:35:00.002+08:00

Well, so yesterday was Sonia's birthday, and yeah I did have fun. But that aside, Samuel asked me a very... thought-provoking question: "Have you ever considered yourself to be human?" I merely laughed.

Well, the truth is, this question has always been in my head. Or rather, a similar question: What makes a human human? Is it race? Religion? The 'human' body? The 'human' mind? The will to live? The ability to adapt? The ability to love? The ability to hate? The ability to think? The soul? The conscience? What actually makes up a human, scientifically speaking? Science cannot explain the soul and the conscience within each and every one of us. So from a scientific aspect, what defines us as humans? Are we really smarter than other animals in the animal kingdom? Are there really differences between animals and humans? Look at our inner beasts; the number of rapists, murderers, liars, thieves in the world, are not humans worse than beasts at times? The killing instinct, the survival of the fittest in the animal kingdom, are these not present in the human world as well?

Humans are probably the most despicable things ever seen on the face of the earth. This statement, in both the physical and spiritual aspects of life, stands true. Physically and scientifically, 'evil' would be the nuclear bomb, mercy killing etc. Spiritually speaking, it would be everything and anything that we do. The human heart is pure evil, undeniably. Every first intention of the heart and the mind would be entertaining evil.

Another question, what is life? What defines life? What is life from a scientific aspect? Is it the thought of tomorrow? The sense of pain? The sense of pleasure? The emotions you feel? The thoughts you entertain? What really is life? Truthfully, life is defined by death. Everything is born to die, be it human or beast. Death is the only reality, while life is just a figment of your imagination. What does it really mean to be alive? In all sincerity, to be alive means to accept your imminent death. Another question, what is truth? Everyone puts on different masks in front of their friends, families, and society. What is 'the truth'? What makes up 'truth'? It would be the lies that makes up the reality.

Okay, enough ranting.

Food for Thought

2008-09-01T18:12:00.005+08:00

Some food for thought:

"Everyone lies according to circumstances. Everyone shows different faces to their families, their friends, and society. But is that really a sin? What is a 'true' face?"
"You have to push away what you truly treasure."
"The further you are from the truth, the more protected you are."
"If you want results, you have to do something. And that method would lead to denying something else."
"Why do people lie? It's because they have a purpose."
"Enforcing kindness onto people; it's no different from evil."
"Good will and ill will are ultimately the two sides of the same card."